The Man Code

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This post has stuff about religion. My perspective has changed


Bling Cart

There exists in this world an order. It is a delineation between the sexes that has, until this time, never been written. It has existed soley in the minds and hearts of every man. It is The Man Code, a complex system that defines what is right, and acceptable for any man to partake or abstain from. And an essential guide to life for any developing young man-child. For example, The Man Codes states:

The following vehicles are the preference order as an > OPERATOR > , in terms of manliness:

  • > Extremely manly, in order:
  • space ship, tank, military vehicle (other than tank), motorcycle, horse, airplane, helicopter, sailboat, motorboat, > ATV > , hot-air balloon, off-roader
  • Somewhat manly, in order:

  • Train, semi truck, pickup truck, stick-shift car, bicycle, city bus

  • Not manly, from best to worst:

  • automatic transmission car, golf cart, limo, cross-country bus, > SUV > motor home

  • Unmanly, from bad to worse:

  • Segway, motorized chair, minivan, station wagon, Vespa

It is important to note that nearly any vehicle can gain a little more manliness by the simple installation of a machine gun, truck rack, rollbars, or toolbox. For example, a Vespa alone is a disgrace to manhood, but with a machine gun (or refrigerator) it becomes a veritable man-machine, so long as it is not one of the unholy colors such as pink or sky blue.


Photograph by Todd Hall