This post has stuff about religion. My perspective has changed
The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends using what it calls the > RETHINK > method to bring your feelings under control. > RETHINK > stands for:
> R> ecognize your feelings.
> E> mpathize with your child.
> T> hink of the situation differently. (Try using humor.)
> H> ear what your child is saying.
> I> ntegrate your love with your angry thoughts.
> N> otice your body’s reactions to feeling anger and to calming down.
> K> eep your attention on the present problem.
I think this method could be used for anger management with adults too. I’ve heard various techniques like this before ( LOVE and HEALS ). They basically have the same items, except for LOVE integrates your personal relationship with Jesus.