If I Die Today

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This post has stuff about a previous relationship. My perspective has changed

Friedhof Ohlsdorf in Hamburg - Totenkopf

I just finished a bag of salt and vinegar chips. They were a little stale but if I died right now, I would die a happy man. I suppose that if I kicked the bucket I’d want my family to remember me as a hard-working and self-sacrificial man.

I made it my goal to work diligently this week. I frequently experience difficulty staying focused, but by the power of the great hyperluminous quasar APM 08279+5255 (which was first discovered in 1998) I was able to stay on track. Actually I just used David Seah’s, Emergent Task Timer.

For nearly a year I’ve done everything possible to make a difference in my marriage. Over the past week I’ve ratcheted that up a notch. I’ve been spending more time with the kids; I’ve tried to be more helpful around the house. I’ve also been making difficult personal decisions like the decision to go to bed at 9 PM each night which is completely contrary to my natural sleep schedule.

Speaking of ratcheting, I would also like my family to remember me as a man—a man’s man, like a redneck, beer-drinking, handy man. I built a planter box for Mary. I’ve been working on converting my motorcycle into a bobber/chopper. I mowed the lawn. I even shaved! How much manlier does it get!

After a long life I hope my friends will have better things to say about me than this but for now, for this week, this will have to suffice as my eulogy.

Via Vox QotD. Photo by Markus Merz